Heb jou sms’jes gestuurd die aan leken te komen maar waarschijnlijk naar de stalking entity zijn gegaan. Het.

Het zit weer gigantisch te stoken, ook tussen vreemden hier om me heen en mij, net als in Portsmouth. Ik ben nog steeds niet van die nachtmerrie af, nee. Het lijkt er met zowel mijn Britse staatspensioen als mijn Nederlandse pensioenen vandoor te willen gaan. Het vindt dat die van hem zijn. (Hopelijk heb ik dat hardstikke mis, maar er wordt in Nederlandse databases gekloot met mijn gegevens – althans, gezien vanaf mijn gehackte mobielen – en mijn staatspensioen is al een stuk gekelderd... Ik kan daar niets tegen doen.) Er zit nog steeds een heel vies incelsmaakje aan wat het doet. Daarom moet ik kapot. Ik mag van het niet zijn wie ik ben. Ik moet ondergeschikt zijn en dus in zijn ogen worden vernederd, zoiets. 

Weet ik veel. Het is knettergek.

Ik zal kijken of ik je kan bellen maar het heeft ook jouw stem geheid allang gekloond.

Ik weet ook niet of dit echt online verschijnt. Het zal wel.

Het heeft nu voor deze website betaald en zit er steeds mee te kloten.

Overigens is Nederland behoorlijk repressief geworden. Niet prettig. De achterdocht waar je mee te maken krijgt omdat je banden met het buitenland hebt is bovendien bijzonder onaangenaam.

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Voor anderen: Volgens mij heb ik nu in alle systemen hetzelfde adres voor mij zitten. In sommige gevallen moet dat door organisaties zelf nog worden bijgewerkt waar ik dat niet kan doen. Praktisch gezien is mijn situatie behoorlijk lastig – mede door terreur van Purmerendse ambtenaren hoewel ik niet kan uitsluiten dat ook dat deels gehackgekloot was – maar het leek me belangrijk om overal hetzelfde Britse adres te hebben staan. Het betaalde commerciële Nederlandse correspondentieadres wordt in Nederlandse databases voortdurend verhaspeld en daardoor gaat papieren post dus verloren. Datums en plaatsen kloppen ook her en der niet meer, althans, gezien vanaf mijn gehackte mobielen.

Zo zou ik in mei 2024 in Purmerend zijn gaan wonen. Eind 2004 zou ik in Amsterdam zijn gaan wonen (maar waar vandaan dan?) en in september 2014 zou ik naar Engeland zijn vertrokken. Daar klopt niets van. Ik kan daar niets aan doen. Ik heb geen idee wat ik ermee aan moet.

De informatie voor 1996 klopt evenmin. Ik heb ooit zelf een invoerfout gemaakt en kon dat niet zien omdat er destijds geen optie voor controle voorafgaand aan indienen was. Ik heb erover gebeld, een jaar of vijf, zes geleden. Men klonk zeer achterdochtig maar de informatie is beschikbaar in hun eigen dossiers. Het papieren dossier ligt in de gemeente Onderbanken waar ik in juni 1996 vanuit Amerika in terecht kwam. Dat dossier zou in 2023 naar Amstelveen verhuizen. Begin 2004 ben ik vanuit Amsterdam naar Amerika verhuisd

(De Nederlandse politie is tegenwoordig zo ongeveer wel de allerlaatste instantie waar je moet aankloppen als je een slachtoffer van een misdrijf bent. Waardeloos.)

I just sent this email:

He tends to go haywire in the run-up to Christmas and has been gearing again.

I just received this email from the National Stalking Helpline. I haven’t contacted them in a long time! There’s nothing they can do for me.

The email was likely spoofed. It had a link for a satisfaction survey that I don’t think had anything to do with the National Stalking Helpline.

It could also have been an email that he’s kept for years, his old game of grabbing my postal mail and emails and sometimes releasing something many months or years later.

I tried to contact the stalking helpline about this but their contact form is not working… It requires a DOB but you can’t enter it.

The advice is dangerous. Never contact the police if you are being stalked. At best, it doesn’t enrage your stalker.

Note : I only posted each image below once. 

once. 

once.

Return-Path: <advice@stalkinghelpline.org>

I have a feeling that yet another attempt is underway to try to get my GoFundMe fundraiser declared fraudulent.

There have been several attempts already.

I don’t know who’s behind that, but when it began, it was followed and partly coincided with someone reporting my Google reviews as fraudulent that had anything to do with the Dutch authorities, including universities.

My money was on civil servants in Purmerend as they had done that sort of thing before.

My NATO review was left in peace.

Someone was trying to discredit me.

Then one day, I discovered that all my older Google reviews were disappearing. Fed up, I deleted all my reviews.

However, it’s also a little like how my LinkedIn account got messed with… That had nothing to do with civil servants in Purmerend.

My LinkedIn account had about 150 connections, almost exclusively people who I had actually worked with. One day, the profile of one of my oldest connections had been replaced by a week-old connection with a photo that wasn’t him.

This was someone who was part of the international group of ARCADIS businesses, but that wasn’t clear from his profile.

He and I had also discussed the possibility of me carrying out a study for them. (Something to do with garbage. I don’t remember the details.)

So this wasn’t just someone who I had plucked off the internet.

That was the moment when I should have disabled my LinkedIn account. I don’t think that I was (sufficiently) aware yet that someone out there was contacting various people to discredit me.

I checked in advance and saw that this month’s outgoing payment was scheduled properly. Except… It’s NOT listed as having gone out. It’s completely disappeared? It’s not listed under failed payments either.

I’ve been having SO MANY PROBLEMS with my Dutch direct debits, for two years now. They disappear into thin air (and companies usually don’t allow you to pay from your end, so you incur fines). It’s affected three or four other accounts too.

I do think that the amount actually went out. (On the basis of the balance. I also remember that I checked that day and I think I saw it listed as having gone out, too.)

It was scheduled for the 24th, I think.

🤬😠😤🙄

My bank just merged with (or was bought by) a bigger bank and I hoped that this would put an end to these hiccups. Nope.

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Amazon including kdp etc hiccups may be because of that outage they had? (Amazon login hiccups happen often.)!It won’t accept the password reset codes either this time, however. Turns out that it says it will send the code to your email but it simultaneously sends a different code to your phone…. Next it sends one to the alternative number that it has for you.

Update 20 Oct: This was followed by several emails about my “friend Steve”. That is a very common English first name. John and Dave are other examples.

Here is part of one:

(This strikes me as largely nonsense, btw. This particular person isn’t really a friend and not someone who would worry about me. He doesn’t care. It’s someone I last saw in 1996.)

Here’s another one:

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Someone in the US just wrote to me: “I receive several emails regarding you from a friend of yours with access to your email — which is how he found me.  That correspondence was brief and has been over for months, but wierd to say the least.”

I’ve asked for this person’s name and to forward me a few of those emails.

I have three names for these hackers now, and two of them are women. One of them is Portsmouth-based and among other things paid for my website for a year.

The other one of the women who contacted me said she was a hacker but I don’t believe her because when she popped up on Telegram, she quickly hid herself but she still popped up on Signal as well and when I sent her angry texts as I have her phone number, one of her responses was really stupid and contradicted what she wrote earlier, basically admitting that she had a reason to be among the “contacts” on my phone. So if she really IS a hacker, she is not a smart one. She speaks Dutch and American English, once arranged to meet with me at a Dutch public library but I found her sitting next to me at a very different public library branch (and drawing attention to herself) months later.

Update 17 June 2026: Ehm, this first woman was Eden Stroet who works at Hadrian in Amsterdam.

I just got a stupid spam message about Kennith Hardin, about my Kennith Hardin order having been accepted or whatever. Something made me google it. It’s a man who murdered his wife. Not funny.

Every once in a while, I also get bombarded by… watches (as well as people asking me for the time, but that was in Portsmouth). I’ve never been able to figure out what it stood for, but I just found an explanation that may fit.

It’s just stupid 4chan-etc-type crap. Usually, the BS had sexual connotations. This one appears to be just about these kids/folks being the annoying abusive prats that they always are so it means nothing, really.

Did I already mention that he keeps deleting this photo from my laptop? And that he also sometimes seems to stop me from finding it on this website, from where I download it each time he’s deleted it again? It’s an old family photo.

The guy has some kind of issue with photos.

Something else has occurred to me that I had forgotten… he has some kind of thing with black guys. One of the first interactions concerned some white woman who had married a Masai man and written a book about it. I think she was English. On Facebook, he presented himself as a black man – several different ones, but the main character was a Charles (Moabene or Boahene or something like that; he made clear that it was him by telling me that he might see me then after I told him I was going to the supermarket, one day, and found “Lee” waiting on the other side of Kingston Road) – and he also sent a black man after me to pester me in Portsmouth, via Freecycle, and then took over the email communications.

Has he picked up that old theme again, by any chance? I wish I could see both these guys’ travel records.

Might the hacker brother be the one with dissociative identity disorder, then? (Have I considered that before? I don’t remember. Probably.)

Whoever it is, he is extremely controlling – often without intending to but also often on purpose – and I think that this gels more with autism than with NPD. The extremely confusing quality of it all also points toward autism rather than NPD. I have no idea whether or how DID might combine with this.

NOTE: He seems to be trying to make clear that it’s not 4chan and it’s not his musician brother who is so obsessed with me. Hard to tell, really.

Currently happening elsewhere in the Netherlands, with Psittacula krameri instead of Columba livia https://nos.nl/artikel/2570860-opnieuw-onthoofd-dier-gevonden-in-capelle-aan-den-ijssel

In my case, an angle grinder was used to accomplish this. I noticed a pattern on the feathers of two affected birds that I handled and asked myself what might accomplish that. Some kind of rotating knife. (I wrote about this in my book “Is cruelty cool?)

Shortly after, someone was holding one up and letting it spin near my home. Bingo.

I just sent this message. Maybe it will help.

Dag,

FWIW

Ik heb dit niet aan de politie doorgegeven, mogen jullie doen als jullie denken dat het zin heeft.

Dit gebeurde onlangs ook in Amsterdam Oost, maar niet met Psittacula krameri maar Columba livia. Anderen hier viel ook op dat er opeens veel dode duiven lagen. Ik heb er toen een video over gemaakt en geüpload en daarna is het hier gestopt. Toeval?

Een zogenaamde angle grinder lijkt te worden gebruikt; ik zag [in Portsmouth] een patroon op de veren [bij de twee betrokken vogels die ik in handen heb gehad] en vroeg me af waar het door kwam. Ben daar dus over na gaan denken en kwam tot conclusie “roterend mes”. (Ben wetenschapper.) 

Haakse slijper. 

Kijk eventueel ook naar betrokkenheid van 4chan.

Dit thema achtervolgt mij al jaren, is voor mij begonnen in Engeland. (Ook in mijn eigen woning, na slotenpikken, wat zeker ruim 13 jaar gebeurde.) Ik heb sinds mijn tijd in Florida door vrijwilligerswerk daar vogels en werd in Engeland doelwit van iets vreemds waar vaak sadisme aan te pas kwam. Eerste aangifte gedaan in oktober 2008.

Eerste hoofd van vogel voor mijn deur in 2010. Betrof dode vogel. Die lag namelijk eerder nog heel in de straat. Was afstraffing voor het niet houden van mijn mond. Was in Southsea. 

Eerste onthoofde duif, was “bevriend” met me, begin 2016, in een andere wijk in Portsmouth. Was afstraffing voor weer eens naar de politie stappen. Het maatje daarvan is in April 2019 ook aangevallen maar overleefde; die kwam naar mij toe met nieuwe maatje. Had enorm veel pijn, heb ik een week of zo in huis gehad en weten op te lappen.

(Politie en gemeenteleiding in Portsmouth weten hiervan, maar dachten dat ik getikt was. (Kost ook heel veel geld om zoiets te onderzoeken.)

Zelfde persoon? Geen idee.

Met vriendelijke groet,

drs Angelina Souren

PS
(Ben momenteel ja ja, heus, niet schrikken, dakloos deels doordat ik dus jaren last van terreur heb gehad waaronder niet alleen slotenpikken maar ook eindeloos hacken, was self-employed, werkte onder meer voor Nederlandse universiteiten, kon het door het hacken compleet schudden. Ik kreeg later overigens onder meer reacties als “we stalken jou met velen dus is het niet strafbaar”. Geen idee wat ik ervan moest denken, maar ik weet wel precies wanneer en met welke persoon dit is begonnen, betekent niet 100% zeker dat het ook die persoon is die dit doet.)

PS
Toen de eerste vogel werd gedood, in 2016, nadat ik weer naar de polities was geweest, kreeg ik trouwens (via hacking) het commentaar dat dit is wat mannetjes doen met vrouwtjes (oid). Ook dat doet aan 4chan denken.

Op 30 mei maakte ik een video die ik via bluetooth op een andere mobiel had gezet en niet goed leek te zijn overgekomen. Zojuist heb ik het origineel geüpload. Deze vogel lag op een plek waar ik ‘s avonds vaak zat. Toeval? Opzettelijk juist daar neergelegd? Geen idee. Ook dit: bird = woman.

10 June 2025: Yes, this abusive nonsense is still continuing. Unbelievable.

UPDATE NEXT DAY (6 June 2025): Today, everything to do with charging and internet connection is working normally again, so yes, I threw out a perfectly fine USB cable and bought a new one because that cable wasn’t broken but I was getting interfered with again. I constantly lost my internet connection and couldn’t charge.

However, today, I noticed the audio cable playing the same game as my USB cables had been doing for about 10 days now – and which he used to do with my CD/DVD drive too – and last night, my big phone lost its charge much too rapidly and was warm.

Continue reading →

In England, he used to get annoyed when I visited the websites of CNN and NOS. That was years ago. He felt that I should only visit those of the BBC and the Guardian and perhaps also The Independent.

Now he is secretly switching my stuff to Dutch, not realizing that a) about at least 50% of the people around me do not speak Dutch, b) I’ve been using English on my computers for decades and c) I’ve been using English for decades and d) the Dutch translations of English (particularly computer) terms can be baffling.

I just experienced the second time in just a few weeks that an electricity socket that had previously been working fine stopped keeping my laptop charged, forcing me to relocate. I wonder how this might come about…

I initially registered with Amsterdam’s other university, but guess what, it was being shut down. That’s why I ended up at this one.

Ouch. Not much earth science left in the Netherlands, then.

Falling student numbers, yadda yadda.

Continue reading →

Was reported online by others, too. Means I am offline until this has been resolved because I don’t have a lot of data on my main number’s SIM card. That’s on a different network. Redundancy.

17:00 Internet access restored (but something got tampered with at my bank – a big invoice which I had blocked for the time being got paid – which I can see in a negative way or in a positive way, negative because it means that I can’t pay any other bills including my mobile phone subscriptions and still can’t use public transport, positive because it probably means that I have access to emergency transportation out of here, should I need it, and I may well end up needing it).

And then some (says me, the stupid delusional old cow).

Consensus target now around $40, with some setting it at 80. Note that ten firms have a hold rating, two a buy and two a sell. Several large investment firms apparently substantially increased their holdings in Q2. (That’s me as merely the messenger, not voicing my personal opinion or research.)

I just like their spunky approach, I like that they are small and up against Goliaths and I like what they do. (There’s negative stuff to be found everywhere.)

Been eyeing them for some time – and this stuff doesn’t require expensive travel efforts – but being hunted down by crazy civil servants acting like total lunatics and similar nonsense is not conducive to this kind of enterprise – and I am well aware of it. You learn this the hard way.

Haven’t been occupying myself with any of this for quite a while, so I don’t know what happened and why it’s up.

It was shockingly low for a while. I hope you were able to buy then and did.

(I’m still very angry. I hate powerlessness and I hate being rendered powerless even more. It draws the worst out of me. I make no secret of the fact that like any other human being out there, I need to and have the right to be allowed to do my thing, be busy, be interested, learn stuff, grow, flourish.)

Continue reading →

Dammit.

Someone was running a pots and pans shop overnight. Haven’t slept. My body is killing me now.

If that continues, I might as well cancel this week’s training right away.

What the fuck was that woman doing all night?

Was it one or was it two?

I think it was one.

Plan A was an unexpected horrible disaster (from which I have learned a lot). It shouldn’t have lasted longer than half a year, but it did. It has cut off many avenues for me, but that’s good because it’s pushing me into a better direction.)

Plan B is still working but is a pit stop.

Plan C I decided to abandon. Maybe I should reconsider, but I don’t feel like it.

Plan D may have fallen through, too, but I am still thinking about it, because Plan D may actually still be perfectly fine for me. (I made a call and encountered not only a real person but also a refreshing level of honesty. 🙏🏻) I figured that I might probably learn something valuable from it in any case. (Update: I decided against this, after a few web searches, but looked into alternatives, which led to several other options… So I sent two messages and also reached out by phone to one commercial party. Nobody there. So my plans are scuppered again?! I reacted to something else too, but am not expecting a response from the person. Next, I sent a message to a different commercial party. Will call them tomorrow morning. Update: they replied.) (If I cannot get anywhere this way, I will kick Plan D2 into increasing action.)

Plan E is also in place. (I have an appointment later this month.)

Plan F, that is probably what I am hoping for most, but I need to have one of those other things work out too. Ideally.

Plans E and F both contain compromises. That’s life. When I was in my thirties, I thought that the sky was the limit. When I was in my thirties, I also learned that it’s not.

As usually, things are going much too slow for me. 😂😎😊 For this reason, I tend to focus on what I can do. It stops me from getting frustrated. It means that I can maintain some momentum.

So the Irish servers have disappeared but I am still often listening to Malti, the language. I contacted the provider about this a while ago and also about being unable to download their app because it thinks I’m in a different country.

No response.

There have been other non-responses and one of my Dutch contacts made a mistake in an email the other day that suggested that he was using Google Translate to turn English into Dutch. He’s the only one who occasionally sends me a short mail.

(Haven’t been able to make contact with anyone, really, after I fled from Portsmouth in 2023. The explanation for half of that is simple. As soon as you can no longer be at people’s beck and call, to serve them, many will drop you like a hot potato. That’s just the way it is. Certainly Dutch people tend to forget about you anyway as soon as you move out of the country. However, I have also had faked responses – notably one text message with two clear indications that it was fake – and several people appear to have disappeared off the face of the earth. Can’t find anything about them that is more recent than 2016.)

No, this hacking nonsense sure hasn’t stopped yet and yes, it’s malicious. (Of course it is. Its very nature alone indicates that, doesn’t it.)

Also, I still sense incel sentiments underneath it every once in a while. I may be mistaken about that, but there’s always been that idea of “if I wipe out your income and render you homeless, you will have to move in with the first man who is willing to take you in”. (Biggest recipe for abuse, of course. I’m so never again doing that.)

I’m not regretting that I left the death trap with all its abuse but of course now the civic offices have not paid my remaining month of benefits yet. They withheld them without prior notification in the previous month too. The only place where you can file a complaint is the people who you are filing the complaint against. They really couldn’t care less. I was shocked to see how biased and abusive these people are. It’s scary. It’s that kind of attitude that makes it possible for stalking to go on for such a crazy amount of time as it has in my case.

I’m pretty sure that he often thinks he’s helping me. But the very deliberate isolation he imposes on me makes clear how fake that is.

He seems to have been preparing some kind of stunt again, perhaps. Dunno.

I still just want my life back.

People would believe me then, if I said that.

It’s a lot less off-putting for them than my crazy and oh-so-exhausting reality. This kind of stuff really happens, people. Suggesting that I might have dementia or whatever doesn’t resolve it.

(Besides, 16 years ago nobody suggested anything like that.)

Btw, I still haven’t figured out my stalker’s connection to Chester.

I still shudder thinking back to it and weep for myself. How the hell did I end up in that dreadful place? How the hell did I manage to do that to myself?

(WoningNet did that to me, too.)

“Doet u maar rustig aan, mevrouwtje.” “U kenniet denkuh, mevrouwtje. U moet niet denkuh dat u ken denkuh. Dat doen wij wel voor u. Wat zeggu?! U wil wat? U mag niets willen, mevrouwtje.” It still makes me shudder.

I was expected to plan and wait patiently for my death but not exactly much more than that.

After 15 years of more or less the same in Portsmouth! I’d already been climbing the walls for so long!

Civic Offices staff going into a neighboring apartment to climb onto my balcony, finding them standing there at my open balcony door, that was the bloody limit. No explanation, no apology. Completely NUTS. Creepy. Scary.

Better than that by now really creepy Elvis Presley song following me around everywhere (which I got to know in a German version first).

(Mostly buskers, people. Not teletransported from Mars straight into my brain or whatever. And only when it concerned some place where I planned to be through emails etc or mentioned I was gonna be in emails etc.)

No more busking stuff, please.