There is a woman two seats down from me who reminds me Tonya Clayton. The way she speaks, the accent.

I hadn’t thought of Tonya Clayton in a very long time. I hope she is well. She is a good person.

If you dress up in any way that makes it look like you are doing something that you should be doing, you can walk into places and walk out with a lot of stuff – such as huge TVs – without anyone stopping you.

I’m at a public library and heard a droning monotone voice that you sometimes also hear from what looks like guys from Africa in a trance or high on something.

This was a white guy in a blue shirt with a logo.

There was a second one.

When I heard some clanging, I wondered if they were taking off with some of the chairs. (Crazier things have happened.)

No, they were actually returning to its regular position. Patrons sometimes move chairs around.

In my journey with birds, I have learned that for example pigeons are capable of true empathy. They are able to understand things such as that mice need to eat too and that if you don’t want mice to show up where you sleep, you shouldn’t spill food near where you sleep (a connection that humans often fail to make).

“Having a bird as your spirit animal indicates empathy, intelligence, and selflessness.”

“Symbolism: Birds are often seen as symbols of freedom, perspective, and transcendence. They can represent the ability to rise above challenges and gain a broader view of life.”

“Spirituality: In many cultures, birds are seen as messengers from the spiritual realm.”

Birds are very forgiving. They understand the limitations of humans. Certainly urban prey birds – as opposed to birds of prey, with which I have no experience – study us to determine who of us is safe and who isn’t. They also understand that we sometimes make mistakes and aren’t superhuman, that we sometimes hurt others without meaning too.

I knew her. I’ve looked after Iggy, but she felt that Blarney (macaw) was too fierce for me to handle. I’ve also been to her boat and I may still have photos of her on her boat. I don’t remember if she’s been to my place. Probably.

Great, yes, but… huh?

Air, I said!

92 minutes

Sigh. Where did this come from?

Happy now?

People, where have you been? Have you been hiding? In your big houses?

People, after the rain, will your life, will it ever be the same?

Oh, people, what will you do, when your luck, when it turns on you?

People, after the rain, will your life, will it ever be the same?

After the rain… We forget!

We get René Aubry’s mesmerising sunlight!

And more air.

Near Barcelona, perhaps…

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So, what I wanted to post here was a deadmau5 and kaskade track. It’s called “I remember”. In Firefox, on my tablet , I’m seeing tracks by The Travellers in this post on the website. In Chrome, in the WordPress CMS, the first track is Celia Baron’s “Tomorrow”. When I tried to post the video again, the intended track showed up in the CMS in Chrome.

The term “raisin girl” refers to “Cornflake Girl” by Tori Amos.

Someone just asked for my signature. “Jij bent sportief. Ken ik een handtekening krijgen?” It’s put a smile on my face. 😊

Someone else offered to take my basket, at the checkout aka till. After I almost hit him with it. 😌

Yesterday , I received a Jacquie Lawson ecard that uses some of it.

But why on earth does that Celia Baron clip keep popping up over and over and over? That was not at all the URL that I copied. (That’s happened before, too, with a book about the future of buildings etc.)

I just received an invitation for an event that’s related to an activity that I too started doing a few months ago. That’s inspirational for several reasons.

And get this: I used to live around the corner from this person. I’ll be damned!

I was in Sun Street and this person is in Star Street.

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Some people believe it’s when they get to do all the talking and you listen and say little in response.

During that conversation, they may even state, in a threatening tone, that they need to see inside your! (temporary) home, for no reason at all, and then when that has no effect, follow it up by having someone else (who probably believes that he has more authority) send you an email from a different town that he needs to see inside your home, also for no reason at all.

Where on earth do such people get the gall from?

That is NOT what I consider a good conversation.

I cannot give (=confer to it) any organization trustworthiness if it doesn’t want to be trustworthy… That works both ways, yes!

My CV should not have to play a role in this. Everyone deserves respect, regardless of CV or age or income or parents.

The earth still isn’t flat, no matter how many times anyone says that it is.

Wait. Haven’t people gone to prison in the past for saying that the earth isn’t actually flat but fairly sphere-shaped?

There was also the shock revelation that the earth isn’t the center of the universe. Someone certainly went to trial over that and was almost crucified, literally. For telling the truth.

I guess I am sometimes like that person. Sometimes you have to be strong and not let yourself be pushed in a direction you absolutely do not want to go into.

PS
Lisa Woods, among many other things, you picked my locks for over 13 years. End of.

Okay, thank you.
I acknowledge that life the world is challenging constitutes or creates many challenges for you. The experiences of the past year have taught me a lot about what that can be like.

And, yeah. Sorry. Sorry sorry sorry. I had no idea. Yikes. This is totally not the country that it used to be, unless maybe I was really really lucky before. And even that was already pretty throttling to me. (Mustn’t want to excel in what I do, even if only for the mere joy of learning to excel at something.)

I decided to treat myself to a walk this afternoon, which turned out to be a wonderful idea.

As I was shooting a video, a bird called out in a panic, possibly a crested grebe whose peace I had briefly disturbed.

Next, I encountered a basket with a sign “Free bay leaves” at a houseboat (which happens to be for sale).

Then I caught a great blue heron admiring itself in a glass facade (but my phone had run out of space).

And after that, I observed a young man on a moped, with a black helmet and dressed in black protective clothing (in case of a fall) yet… singing. In hot weather.

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Today, someone called me rather late in the day. I had to dig up my phone as it was plugged into my computer. Awkward. Then I had to unplug it because I wanted to talk to the person who called. Also awkward.

This was someone who wanted to meet. But the way she formulated the suggested time was rather odd. I didn’t realize it at the time, but it made me want to choose a different time. Because the time she mentioned confused me.

Funny how such things influence us.

She formulated the suggested time in a way that took up more words than necessary. It made me think “eh, what time?”.

Now I wonder if it may be something new or something regional. Time to Google it.

Did that. Yes, apparently, it’s regional.

Only now I also realize that the way she phrased the time really confused me. I thought that the new time she mentioned was only 20 minutes later. It’s not at all only 20 minutes later.

I somehow connected it to an odd English way of phrasing certain times that some people use. Half 10, that’s 10:30, for example. Half 10 is 9:30 in Dutch.

We have a theme going?

He’s just passed away, by the way, which is why I am playing this and because I don’t seem to have anything better to do at the moment. It’s not as if I can put my things in my car and drive off so that I can leave all the crazy people in the entire world and the messes they cause behind me. I so wish I could. I so wish I could have done that 18-20 months ago or at the end of 2019.

I used to play themes, on blip, a century ago.

You see, someone who has an idea to which someone else might reply “ma quale idea!” may have lost his way…

Europe has also lost its way in many ways relative to the UK, I now repeatedly find myself thinking, to my astonishment. I had not realized that things had changed this much over here, while I was away, and this badly. By contrast, the UK is now even turning a corner. (The Netherlands seems to be really godawful these days. Yikes. Crazy weirdos on my tail who pester me was the last thing I needed on top of that. I never liked the Netherlands much but I should have been able to make a living here for a while and then take off again. You can’t do that with a bunch of crazy weirdos on your tail. Just like in Portsmouth, so far, he’s or they’ve managed to sabotage just about everything again. Goddamn hackers. So much hate behind it all, so so so much hate.)

I used to feel home wherever I was, if I had to (as some places are still better than others), because home was inside me. Portsmouth took that away from me. What happened in Portsmouth filled me with fear too often and eroded my sense of security very badly. When the crap followed me out of Portsmouth and then started smashing everything to pieces in my next country too… goddammit. What is wrong with people who are THAT DESTRUCTIVE? What on earth is wrong with them? And is it fixable or not?

I need to be free, free from pestering, see only fresh faces and be only a fresh face for others for a very long time to establish a new baseline and a new life. I couldn’t believe that after five escape attempts I would have to flee again. I have to. I have no choice. . .

I want my life back.

He does not want to be IN my life. He does not want company. He does not feel lonely. He just wants to control every aspect of it and enjoy my powerlessness. And he wants to get angry with me and punish me when he feels like it and yell “nah nah nah nah nah”, hacker-style and “whore” and what not, manipulator-style, like the kids he used to send after me in Portsmouth when he no longer often could get any adults to pester me.

One time when I had kicked him out of my computer again, a kid walked up to me, crying, said that his mother had kicked him out of the house. A few hours later I ran into the kid again and it had all been just one big show. That sort of thing happened often too. Totally crazy. But the adults were worse. There was SO MUCH HATE behind it. Extremely unpleasant to be on the receiving end.

(The kids didn’t know any better, but the adults were after only one thing. My utter misery, and prolonging it as much as possible.)

People, we urgently need some herring circuses.

(Mine are in tomato sauce. I only bought them today, but I don’t think that I can still train them.)