Here we go again…

16:31: A text message from GiffGaff telling me that the text that I just sent was charged from my balance. I didn’t send a text…

AFTER I got this message (see image at bottom of this post), I made a call to the US, wanting to tell someone about what was happening but nobody was home and I hung up. (When I get voicemail, I have not necessarily gotten through to the person’s phone number. I learned this the hard way.)

Guess what the text message says now!! Fifty minutes later!

(And no, I did not rotate this photo; it was taken the same way as the previous photo and i uploaded it straight from my simless phone, via my computer and a sim-containing phone. After this, I mysteriously was no longer able to access the simless phone from my computer so that I could have rotate the photo in my computer, so I downloaded the uploaded photo instead, rotated that and uploaded it again; see below.)

(I’ve similarly also had messages telling me that my phone credit has run out without there having been sufficient phone use to explain it.)


Stupid incels.


In 2010, I managed to print a traceroute that showed that my internet traffic was being diverted. When the hacker caught on, he interfered, but instead of saving it, I had sent it straight to the printer. So the hacker was too late, I’d already caught him, got proof. (I could no longer access my business e-mail on my computer, but things were fine when I tried to access my business e-mail from my IBM laptop.) That diversion was punishment for not keeping my mouth shut about what was going on. I couldn’t take that traceroute to the police. Those folks barely knew what a computer was and too many of them are really vile misogynists themselves.

I’ve gotten “punished” quite a few more times since for not keeping quiet about the horrific abuse I’ve been subjected to since I moved to Portsmouth.

You will have to kill me to get me to shut up. Kill me. Just kill me, you stupid haters. Take a knife to my throat, bash my head in with an axe, whatever.

This has been going on for nearly 15 years!

England is awash in hate. It’s not just these incels. That rampant hate makes it possible for a situation like this to exist for so long. “Just a senile old cow who does not know how her phone or her computer works.” “Just a little vulnerable, a little delusional when under stress, maybe.” “You know what older women are like.”

Also, sometimes: “If you don’t like it, why don’t you go back to where you came from?” (Some local people may be on my side but are just as powerless as I am.)

In case you still have any doubts, it’s dark now so the lighting is bad but you can see in the photo that I just took, then redacted (to shield the person in the US) and uploaded to post below that I did NOT make that call at 16:31 but at 16:38. (Apparently, there are limits to what hackers can edit in your phone. And in case you haven’t realized it yet, there goes some of the evidence that is used in legal proceedings, right? Or maybe that is why it can be so hard to get evidence? Because that evidence can get edited via hacking?)

(Yes, I was able to access that sim-less phone again at the time and redact the photo on my computer.)


14 February:

I’m particularly worried about participating in events in England or elsewhere in the UK because these hackers do not want to end up being extradited to the US. They clearly feel much more comfortable with anything that happens in the UK and feel less reticence with regard to messing with anything in the UK. That said, there’s occasionally also been an apparently Dutch component in the hacking activity.

One of my sisters certainly appears to have gotten hacked, too, because of me (or in any case, this was suggested; it was suggested that all she cares about is jewelry and clothes and that this might have been gleaned from having hacked into her equipment) (and I also still suspect that someone I know in Amsterdam got targeted because of me, because I suddenly started hearing similar stories from her, about things that were happening in her life that were very similar to what happened in my life when all of this began, though I cannot be sure, of course).

I’m currently also getting a lot of spoofed mails related to academia.edu. I am receiving notifications from a related domain name, but the notifications that I receive are not reflected in my academia account. They all or mostly refer to an article I wrote a few decades ago, about the environmental and analytical chemistry of cyanide. (When they don’t refer to that article, they refer to a recent book.) I simply delete them.

(I think – though can’t be sure – that what it aims to do is make me feel guilty about calling someone “cyanide” and “showing the world what it is like to live with cyanide”. The title of that article was “living with cyanide”. Alternatively, the person sees himself as toxic and sees it confirmed in what I write?)

In addition, I recently started getting e-mails from Eric Hauch at Authory. I had indeed set up a free account there a few years ago, to see if it might be useful (had to set up an account in order to be able to check it out; didn’t seem useful, though). I had set it up with a different e-mail address and it is unlikely that Erich Hauch could have known about the existence of the address that he (someone pretending to be him?) was e-mailing me at. His e-mails correctly mentioned the two sites that I had entered in the Authory account, and later dropped one of them (where I no longer have an account). I did a search on “Authory” and it seems to have dropped off the radar completely. This, getting e-mails at addresses at which I don’t have an account registered for parties that e-mail me has happened a few times before in the past few years.

Added later: Around this weekend (I think it was Sunday), I also received a text message (!) asking me to call the number from which the text message came to receive instructions for how to get the Portsmouth News to pay attention to the fact that, allegedly (i.e., according to the sender of the text message), local MP Stephen Morgan refuses to support the Free School Meals for All bill (by Zarah Sultana, also Labour). (I was and still am not able to verify whether he does support the bill or not, but did find that apparently he was one of only 2 MPs in Hampshire who voted for free school meals within a different context in 2020, and with regard to Hampshire only.) I’ve gotten more somewhat strange stuff to do with that local MP in recent years, including a request to send his office a video that I had made at the start of the pandemic. (I did send it; during the lockdowns, verifying information or the authenticity of communications was sheer impossible anyway and I didn’t think that sending the video could do any harm, regardless of who it went to, as it was already online anyway.) I don’t even support Labour.

For the record, yesterday evening, the screen of one of my monitors suddenly started going blue a lot (and it was not a connector issue). Blue is the color for Portsmouth and “Pompey women are real women.” When I shut down my computer, it wouldn’t shut down. (That’s likely because at least one active process kept it from shutting off after the screen went black.)

10:24: Am getting messed with right now, in one of my protonmail accounts.


15 February: The problem with the interference is that it seems to come from small-minded, inexperienced individuals who don’t have much of a clue of how the world works beyond their little bubble. That means that even if what they are doing is (but I doubt that it is) relatively innocent in nature, they could still do a lot of harm (to others) without even realizing it.

In the past decade, I’ve also gotten this “look, what a great appointment we got you…” “… so we can pull more nonsense to try to make you look like a complete fool again” a few times.

Just before the weekend, someone I had e-mailed previously, regarding an online meeting I wanted to attend and to which I was subsequently invited, had been added to “important persons” in Gmail. It was the only address in that category and I had not added it to my contacts. (I have Gmail set to not automatically adding contacts.) A little later, while I was looking up some info in a previous book that I wrote, whoever was in my computer at the time, stopped at the name of one of the people who would be attending that meeting, which was really odd, as I’ve attended other meetings that had people in them that I had mentioned in the same book. So what was the fuss about? This particular person, however, has gotten a bad rep and probably has a lot of gossip value in English eyes. (I’m not quite sure what was going on, and I can’t know what was going through the hacking person’s mind, but I later had reason to start wondering if I was being fed misinformation again – via another channel – to try to get me to make me look like an idiot if I wrote about it. It’s happened before.) I decided to drop all interest in the matter, deleted a follow-up e-mail I later received, unread, asked the university group in question to take me off their mailing list and also asked someone else who I had sent an e-mail to within this context to ignore my earlier e-mail. There are a lot of tensions within this context already (within science as well as between nations).

I regret having contacted the organizers of the meeting. I should have known better. I do feel like an utter fool about that. There’s so often this “iemand blij maken met een dode mus”, this “nah nah nah nah nah, got you again!”. The problem is that I have no idea who’s messing with me, let alone what on earth is on their mind. ,

It’s utterly puzzling, but the message that’s often directed at me is something along the lines of “you’re so dumb, you’re so stupid”. On Monday and on one or two other days, there was repeated interference with something that is usually intended just to stop me from doing what I want to do. So, yeah, I stopped trying to do what I wanted to do. I can’t stop the hacking interference and it’s of such a nature that it usually completely blocks what I wanted to do. Sometimes, I can find a way around it, but often, I can’t. At other times, it does NOT want to stop me from doing something (such as this time, but that only became clear much later when I realized that I suppose that the hacker(s) wanted me to do a specific thing). I also recall a time when I wasted four hours doggedly trying to do something that the hacker(s) did not want me to do, as it turned out. Sometimes, the hacking entity wants me to persevere in spite of the obstruction and at other times, they want to teach me that they feel that one should not do not do certain things (such as claim expenses or claim an offered refund). I’m not a mind-reader with regard to the various folks that hang out in my equipment. So on Monday, I just gave up and stopped doing what I was doing. The hacker(s) could have meant the exact opposite of what apparently he or they had been trying to tell me (in retrospect); there is no way for me to know or verify, so for me, the interference is highly disruptive and frustrating.

It’s all utterly baffling.

A few years ago, when I wanted to reach out to an old contact of mine, who also happens to have an interest in diversity angles and inclusivity and who happened to have a higher position in academia than the above-mentioned woman, the hacker(s) interfered and stopped me, claiming that the woman in question would have forgotten about me. (No.) So why was the above-mentioned woman so important to the hacker(s)?

What can I still do that will NOT get interfered with?

(Btw, the reason why I spelled out above what I meant by “kill me” is that the previous time I wrote that, they “killed me” IT-style. Took down = “killed” my internet access first, over the holidays, and then my SIMs. You “kill” an IT process… So they “killed” me. Ha ha.)

Is anyone aware of the existence of a hacker group that calls itself Google, by way of a joke? (As in “we’re everywhere in your life” or “we’re everywhere in society”?) Just wondering.

Also, on the 15th, two gadgets with the Bluetooth name “accessories” or “accessory” suddenly popped up late in the evening.

18 Feb: So yesterday, a Facebook page about Portsmouth thought I was based in mainland China. I was not using a VPN. Saturday’s event took place mainly in China.

Earlier this week, there was a day on which all e-mails except the top four did not show and the top one’s heading showed as “we are treating you to an email overflow”. Ha ha. So much mail does not reach me or does not reach the intended recipient. It can cause and has on occasion caused a lot of friction (between me and the party I am trying to communicate with, which can be anyone, does not have to be a friend but can just as easily be a business or a medical practice). I wish I had taken a photo, just because the view was so astonishing.

A few months ago, something happened on my screen that seemed to suggest that at least two parties had told or rather, complained, to the police to investigate my odd stalking situation.

There have also been a few references to there being another poster boy. For what, however, that was not clear.


I think I should give up. Rather than continuing to try to explain that we really are no longer in the world of feathers, fountain pens and horse-drawn carriages but that each keyboard is connected to billions of other keyboards now and that this brings a myriad of new possibilities beyond the capabilities of most of us, I should probably bow my head and remorsefully admit that I have front-lobe dementia. I am probably not even based in Portsmouth. I am probably living in Des Moines or some other place like that, don’t you think?

(Trying to use humor to kick myself out of the depression that I often slide into after hacking interference got to me.)

Photo by Ketut Subiyanto on Pexels.com

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