My main professional background is in the earth & life sciences, but I now also explore topics in the broad area of bioethics. That's about equality, fairness, justice, diversity and inclusivity. It's also about people's biases, the associated otherization and everything that this can result in. That includes poverty, homelessness and poor health, shabby looks and shrinking personal bubbles, exposure to chemical and noise pollution and lots more. It's also about law, philosophy, neuroscience, technology, forensic psychology, politics and public policy (governance). Diversity and inclusivity are much bigger challenges than I used to believe. I for example now think that society's lack of genuine acceptance and support for people whose brains work very differently can among other things result in destructive behaviours for which the forensic psychology terminology is sadistic stalking or resentful stalking. My own experiences on the receiving end of something like this caused me to start looking into personality disorders and neurodiversity. That is how I stumbled upon bioethics. Seeing the massive inequality in England had something to do with it too. No, I don't have all the answers. Do you?
I have detected a second slightly autistic person in my environment!
There have occasionally been puzzling questions, comments, actions and jumps to conclusions as well as a definite rigidity.
The person in question had actually indicated something along those lines, two years ago or so, as a remark from his ex. I didn’t think that it was accurate.
However, I recently started seeing similarities with the autistic friend who I have known for decades. (Since 1982.)
Now everything is clicking into place.
Appearing to be very even-tempered, emotional overwhelm usually remains hidden but gets expressed as baffling actions and changes in decisions that can even cause quite a problems for others.
The rigid attachment to some ideas can come across as forgetfulness, but that is not what it is in this case.
I am seeing too literal interpretations and the lack of perception of there being a judgement attached to some words, missing the emotional context of some expressions, and not always realizing when a remark is intended as a joke.
It really helps to recognize and understand this and then to be able to take it into account.
I actually remember the first time I spoke to this person… because his response was strange. I didn’t know what to make of it.
I seem to have caught a Dutch cold virus on public transport. The heat helps with that, too.
Not only is the contrast with the widespread misery and poverty of Portsmouth utterly surreal, it’s also wonderfully refreshing to no longer have all kinds of nastiness flung at oneself on a daily basis.
People around here are friendly and normally respectful. They notice me, sure. They don’t obsess over me. Why would they? They have fulfilling lives of their own.
They’re certainly not flinging all kinds of filthy contempt at me.
I’m often still really guarded and I often still subconsciously expect the usual nastiness to rear its ugly head and peek around the corner all of a sudden, certainly now that I know that Portsmouth was far nastier than I imagined, as it turned out.
But there’s no need for that here.
My fairly typically English paranoia – aka insularity – is slowly disappearing. I don’t have to look over my shoulder all the time here, to guard my back.
In retrospect, I have a hard time believing and accepting how vile and vicious Portsmouth is and I’m really taken aback by the realization that it was a far bigger stinking corrupt cesspool than I even thought.
(That is in spite of already having said that it has a ‘ndrangheta-style culture.)
I didn’t want to go on being stuck in that war zone. I got so tired of everyone and their brother and sister always gunning for everyone else all the time, one way or another, there. I got so tired of the fighting. The place is out of control.
So many people there were so tightly wound, so tense, so ready to snap.
I got so fed up with all the crap and the hatred, the abuse, the sabotage, all of it.
Such a vile sadistic shit show of a place, Portsmouth. Far worse than I thought.
I feel so sorry for everyone there who remains stuck there and continues to get screwed by what seems to constitute “the establishment”. Folks who have no shame, no ethics, no morals and in their view, the boundless right to abuse others.
It still makes my stomach turn.
I couldn’t do it any longer. I had to get out. I had to.
The place was killing me quite literally, suffocating me to death in all sorts of ways.
I couldn’t do it any longer.
The way I broke away enabled a clear break, psychologically, even though it may hamper me in practical ways, but, oh well. I’m leaving filth, contempt and abuse behind me.
Never again.
It’s my understanding that they callously killed my pet bird. I’m actually at peace with that. The past three years were the best of her life. She deserved them. She had empathy for other creatures, I noticed.
Portsmouth’s establishment’s so evil that it still makes my skin crawl to think back to it. These people stop at nothing. Quite scary, really.
I used to vote for these cold-hearted scumbags.
I get where all the people who told me that they don’t vote are coming from now.
The level of filth these politicians bathe in is really quite something, but not in a positive way.
This was my pet bird. She would often sleep there, under the fleece blanket, against my chest for around an hour. Then she would wake up and preen her feathers. Next she would fly away, for a sip of water.
This morning, I experienced a bit of culture shock when I realized that I can no longer pop into Asda or Tesco for anything I need.
Food? Supermarket.
Dust pan? Blokker.
Socks or slippers? A third place.
Phone or tablet? Some other place.
Cup of coffee? Not a Costa in sight.
Etc.
But this afternoon, feeling very tired hence cranky, I stood up to someone after which we peacefully cooperated to replace some gas tubing. I can put an old-fashioned kettle on now. Yes!
If I had done that in Portsmouth, the entire town would be up in arms and it certainly wouldn’t have been followed by peaceful cooperation. I’m relearning how to protect my boundaries. Was impossible to do in Portsmouth, protecting my boundaries.
Respect other people’s boundaries. Don’t walk all over them.
So a woman just started talking to me about the FBI and the police and the CIA.
I saw the flash in her eyes when I told her that it’s good to pick one’s battles wisely.
Stop this insulting nonsense please. Don’t you get it? I want nothing to do with a place where it’s seen as normal that males empty buckets of water or urine over women and yell insulting slurs at them and feel it’s not done for a woman to have a profession that is not a traditional women’s job (or support herself at all).
I’ve experienced this nonsense with a stranger talking to me to see how I responded once before in this bizarre misogynistic shit show of a town. I said nothing about it back then. Why bother?
(Later I accidentally discovered where this came from. Then I understood. This place is such a cesspit. Unbelievable!)
Yes, I told this woman today that my name is Angie and that I’m a geologist. Why go into a lengthy explanation of my full professional background? Doesn’t mean that I have DID or whatever bullshit you’re going to cook up next, Portsmouth.
Local average IQ?
2.
Range 0 to 4 or thereabouts.
Yes, I look unwell. Very. That’s shame on YOU!
When I say I want my life back, I’m including my health. That is a thing that most people here don’t even get to experience.
All I have been doing in recent years was wait for the first occasion to get out of this hellhole and get my life back on its feet. Some of the rest was mostly camouflage, I suppose. I’m simply not the knitting and crocheting and embroidery and needlepoint type. I had to do more than that. Sorry if this offends your tender Victorian souls.
Holy cow, the misogyny here truly has no bounds. Yikes. 😬
I have met three or four smart and well functioning people during my time in Portsmouth. Two were working at the London Assembly (one of them calls himself a general factotum these days, last time I looked), one was a London-based barrister and one was a judge who liked cutting through crap. He called me a little feisty, legally speaking, made it a question. I replied “yes sir”. (Blame Clifford Chance, perhaps.) His name was Wilson, I think. These hardworking and efficient folks had no need to tell silly lies either.
You insult me, I throw it right back atcha, yes.
(I know how super sensitive Portsmouth is. That said, I am not making this up on the spot, about those three or four smart folks.)
If you rent a dwelling that requires you to rent a dwelling or at least a storage space and an office and a hotel room elsewhere where you can keep all your stuff, be safe and live your life, what do you call that first dwelling?
Hacker(s) been messing around again for the past hour or so, gearing up fan among other things, though not too badly this time. Tomorrow, he will lose all access to me. He must be fretting like crazy.
Also, I got some yogurt for 16 p – I bought two pots – and little gem lettuce for 40 p (pack of 2) and that is delicious with rice and the black beans I cooked (pepper, salt, garlic and bay leaves) and a dash of tomato puree and some olive oil. Oh, and a dash of chili powder.
Police officers are so clueless. This article mentions the lock-downs. During the first lock-down, my hacker pushed me out of my flat one evening and while I was walking along Commercial Road, I saw a man hovering which caught my attention. He veered toward me but something made me not interesting enough for him and a little later, he latched onto another woman. I decided to follow him.
At Portsmouth & Southsea train station, he crossed the road and I thought that that would be the end of the story, but he only did it because there were police officers standing around at the station, laughing.
He crossed the road again a little later. I looked for quite a while after that but once they were around the corner, I could not see him any longer and I couldn’t spot the woman either. This worried me. I looked into a few shops there, but no.
At no point did I bother approaching the cops. They’re way too…
Various kinds of weird things going on on various sites (including Facebook) and just now, I had to flip the power switch on the wall again. Computer froze again.
Phone was hot again too, so someone was definitely … argh… doing whatever shit that it was.
I still keeps getting whirlpool on my screen.
17:17: phone is still way too warm for this phone (remember, I tether).
17:31: computer does seem faster than it was before so he may have skedaddled off.
I continue to get e-mails from Stephen Morgan MP – but I hear nothing at all from people who I have actually e-mailed – and the hacker keeps putting whirlpool on my screen.
14:34: Trying to contact someone in the UK, and am getting a yandex.ru chat bot instead. A UK page that I wanted to look at was “not available in my country”.
14:51: Computer keeps freezing, too. Have had to throw the power off it twice in the past hour.
I just discovered that the link named “Amazon UK” in the header of my YouTube channel had been changed into “angelinasouren@gmail.com”.
I’ve received a message from “Lisa Woods” in New Zealand; I get a lot of e-mails from New Zealand – south of where I am – when my landlord and sometimes the city council is indicating actions against me OR when my hacker makes it look like that or tries to suggest that.
The hacker(s) appears to catch my e-mails and sometimes releases them in bunches; I sometimes receive e-mails that are many years old, just like I’ve also sometimes received local postal mail that was nearly a year old and just like Royal Mail once handed me a package of wet and muddy letters from a period of about 6 months.
“Scotland” and “Canada” are sometimes used to refer to someone located north of me.
Oh. My post categories have disappeared… as an option for this post, that is. (17:11: They popped up again later in the day.)
My stalker(s) is after acceptance of who he is/they are. So he may want this to go in the category “Human rights – diversity – neurodiversity – equality – inclusivity – discrimination – otherisation – speciesism – planet – consumerism – bioethics sensu lato” or maybe he feels that all my posts fit.
He’s gone on about “zero discrimination day” in the past, would pop a certain graphic onto my screen. Is in my computer right now, possibly, or at least on the line, apparently; my typing was suddenly delayed, which usually means that he is between me and the internet so that he can even change things that I type or remove them.
He’s often also highly manipulative.
08:21: On my screen, it says that 10 people have watched this video. Is it actually online, though? Probably, but I can’t be sure.
14:26: have seen this twice now
I’ve been the target of sadistic stalking – aka resentful stalking – for nearly fifteen years. In this video, I give you examples of things that have been done in my home when I was out.
He also does things like go through my cupboards and sit at my desk, go through my drawers. He takes things that he likes, such as nifty little tools. I’d had one of those for decades, one that means that you can do a lot without needing several much bigger tools.
The stalking has resulted in many periods of extreme deprivation, leading to among other things tendon vulnerability. In 2010, my weight briefly dropped below 50 kilograms. I am 5 foot 7 or 1.69m.
The police know about most much of this; I’ve also carried out a risk analysis and handed it to them. The police cannot afford to investigate until after a human has been killed or seriously injured (or if they become concerned about the possibility of a PR disaster).
Stalking and harassment need to be dealt with very differently and should not be handled by the police, for starters, because the police lack the required expertise. The latter makes such investigations too expensive for them. I’ve asked the police forces (FOI request) how much they spend on investigating stalking and harassment, to see if freeing up that budget could fund a separate organization, but they don’t even have data on that.
Yes, I’ve added, changed and upgraded locks. Local locksmiths who I consulted were no help at all. It certainly doesn’t help either that I am based in a really vile, extremely insular place on a small island off the coast of England. I’m from Amsterdam, so I am a migrant.
I’ve been self-employed since 1997.
This stuff has made me really wary of humans and often fearful, but also angry and louder, the latter not the American way (enthusiastic and confident), but the English way (telling people off when they hassle you).
Anyone who still believes that women should see it as something romantic and flattering if they become stalked or that stalking is the figment of the imagination of feeble-minded women with an anxiety problem should seek the services of a good shrink.
This is something I’ve been fantasizing about for a long time. There are other solutions on this website that will help you light up dark homes and enable heat from the sun to enter in colder weather and help vent hot air overnight in hot weather.
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Only one solution, then, seems to me. Do what you can to leave the country. Do you REALLY want to stay in a place where it is still not done for women to support themselves and where women are still supposed to let themselves be punched around endlessly?
That employee – former business owner – is the BEST! So is the CEO. Both end up with tears in their eyes.Builders.In the US.
Hugs the CEO.
That Best Western executive is a disgrace and needs a kick in the behind. The chef needs to learn to stand up for himself. Damn that stupid toxic English class system.
The health of millions of young people is already being ruined as a result of excessive inequality. This means that most of these young people will be in ill health when they get older. It is not the result of age, it is the result of poverty and deprivation.
The following too is something that is so vile, it’s hard to accept that this is not some kind of prank article. Children playing outdoors being considered an antisocial nuisance? We owe that to Tony Blair, by the way, and his bonkers class ideas. Labour is at times more Tory than the Tories.
Yanking my screen (cursor) up and down, putting different tabs on my screen. Adding a hiccup to a video, which he has done before. Just being a general disruptive attention-seeking pain in the behind.
Whoever’s been messing with me for so long once informed me that he had bugged my place. This was years ago. I couldn’t find anything. I installed some kind of detection app on the phone I had back then – couldn’t afford a proper detector because I had barely any income – and got mocked by the hacker(s) while I was using it. This may be a point to remind you that I have had many phones fried to death because the hacking would cause them to overheat.
They’d been picking my locks for years. I never saw it coming.
The video below starts with the example of an AirBnB in Ireland.
Something is off with the electricity in the flat. I’ve just had the light bulb in the same floor lamp pop on three consecutive days; the lamp was not even on when it popped just now. It is on a small surge protector but that surge protection went a long time ago.
Another one also popped yesterday, with a loud bang.
So there currently seems to be something in the circuit with a large resistance. I stopped using the ceiling light a long time ago, but when it worked, it would dim shortly after switching it on and I remembered the counter current you get on circuits after you activate it, but you don’t get that effect from a simple light bulb. It would also often dim and glow in a cycle. I found that I can’t play a keyboard in this flat because there was a very loud hum on it when I tried.
My location is Regents Park in London. I am not using a VPN (because that means that I have no internet access), am tethering via my mobile phone and am at my desk in Portsmouth. The Geolocation API on a computer uses the network routing addresses to estimate your current location. So how come that this often lands me in places like Edinburgh, Birmingham and Leeds?
I understand that this can happen with VPNs, but why does my connection/location often change before or after when I have interference on my screen or when I write about it?
I just tried to install a VPN again, this one has something specifically for my distro, twic, but it doesn’t seem to be really installed.
I also decided to activate this:
Okay, the following may explain my frequent location mismatches:
Google determines its users’ location by cross-checking the location of where the IP address is with the geolocation data it has of devices that use that IP address. If Google detects a significant number of devices using that IP address are in a certain area, it will change the location it lists for that IP address.
How does that translate into real life? Does this mean that there are many more O2 users in places like Leeds and Edinburgh with similar IP addresses and is that why Google thinks that I am there? My IP address is also always blocked on Wikipedia, btw, so I can’t edit anything without logging in.
Nope, the Proton VPN won’t install on my system.
Also… I just found a sock that must have disappeared years ago because I no longer had these socks or maybe it isn’t even mine. It was now in my box of socks to be mended along with two padded-sole socks that don’t need to be mended. (No other black socks in it, no.)
My lock-picker’s also taken a black garment with a grey heart on it once, and returned it one or two years later. He certainly has a sock fetish. Besides that he has recently taken about half of my black socks, apparently, he also once took 5, 6 pairs of colorful socks from my dirty laundry – into which he tipped some cigarette ashes – and later returned a bunch of black socks for them.
Anyone who thinks that this is funny should remember that he’s also destroyed things and attacked animals.
In the UK, people over roughly the age of 45 are widely demonised. In a recent court case, in which Wiltshire traders were jailed, the judge expressed the view that older adults are “vulnerable”, which is often a euphemism for “not right in the head” or “gullible” or worse.
Judge Jason Taylor KC, please refrain from automatically considering all older adults easy targets for abuse and fraud from now on. That’s despicable and it actually encourages targeting of older adults.
Targeting of older adults – mocking and abusing them – has become far too accepted in the UK.
On this page, there is a video in which the rogue roofers say “we’re doing some bodging”. Without explaining what bodging is, the nature of the video will largely remain hidden from anyone who does not know what “bodging” is.
What these rogue traders were doing was targeting people who they believed were affluent. These people were living in bungalows, in a position to fork out a lot of money, interested in having a good roof over their heads and who were usually at home during the day.
There is no point in knocking on the doors of people who are not at home but at work.
Affluence often comes with age, too.
A great deal of the British prejudice against older people actually has to do with the massive inequality and widespread deep poverty here, with the resulting health issues. This plays a bigger role later in life. It’s not age that makes a lot of older adults in Britain slow and fragile. It’s poverty (lack of good nutrition) and also lack of good healthcare.
This, below, is a more balanced way of putting it, “vulnerable” likely referring to actual early dementia and mobility problems. (Why not simply say it?) Having for example mobility problems makes it hard to stand up to aggression; if you do, you risk getting beaten up. This is why I would like to see organizations like AgeConcern offer self-defense classes.
It’s not something feeble-minded women with an anxiety problem have cooked up in their paranoid little minds.
I’ve been warning about this and other voice tricks for years. I usually got hand-waived away. Even when people believed me, they were convinced that they’d never come into contact with anything like that because they were just ordinary people.
12:22: has been messing with me for a few minutes now, jerking pages up and down, blocking internet access. Time to reboot the lot.
He seems to be obsessed with these photos now, btw? Happy old me versus miserable, deflated and wary me?
19 March 2023
15:40: My internet location is Leysholme Crescent, Lower Wortley, in Leeds again. West Yorkshire. Am not using a VPN and I am at my desk in Portsmouth.
This morning, when I walked past a woman at a bus stop along Kingston Road, she said something. No idea what. She wasn’t on the phone. Nobody else was around. As I was walking toward the bus stop, she seemed to ooze anger for me. No idea why that might be so; she was not anyone I recognized. It goes with Portsmouth, this kind of thing. I just shrug about it as much as I can.
As will be very obvious to anyone who stops by on this site regularly, I often sign petitions, for matters all over the world. This can involve the sending of e-mails. PETA petitions sometimes ask us to e-mail for example Fish & Wildlife people in the US.
UK petitions ask us to e-mail an MP; the e-mails are usually sent by the petition creators.
I actually stopped doing that because I was getting a bit fed up with the bland ducking exercises I often received in return. Occasionally, I still make an exception.
That said, yes, I also recall having written to the MPs’ office about a plan to start selling NHS patient data or making them available to an American company or something like that, something that the UK government tried to sneak past the public during the pandemic. I did that from my gmail address.
Anyway, they just explained to me that they don’t actually reply to e-mails but create new e-mails and they use e-mail addresses that they have on file.
That’s why. Good to know. Every explanation helps.
Also, I was out for hours on Monday, but I haven’t seen any signs yet that the locks got picked while I was out then. (Someone was in my computer when I got home, though; I had left it on but I didn’t need to log into it, which I normally have to do after 15 minutes of inactivity.)
I suspect that the lock-picking bullshit ended on or around 31 March.
Here’s why: as of Tuesday, they’ll no longer be able to pick my damn locks anyway, the vile, sadistic abusive piece(s) of shit. Like I said before: I’ve won. My mistake was fighting back, because that made it more fun for you to destroy things or thwart whatever I wanted to do anyway. When I stop fighting back or do the damage you want to cause before you can do it, I take away your motivation and leave you with nothing but empty hands. I learned that last year.
Or is this just another one of the strange coincidences that have been in my life since I moved to Portsmouth, such as getting e-mails from Le Monde longer after I stopped needing access to its databases and getting an e-mail sent through a Dutch provider that didn’t even exist any longer at that point (no relay)?
I just received an e-mail from Vastgoedmarkt (“real estate market”). I am no longer signed up to its newsletter; I was for a while in the past.
